


Wishing on a Star, That's Just a Satellite

by silentwhisper002



Series: After The Storm [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on an All Time Low Song, Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Friendship, Listen There's Just a Lot of Angst Okay?, Reminiscing, Sam Is a Good Friend, Steve is also dead, Steve is mentioned, rip steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:02:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25957960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silentwhisper002/pseuds/silentwhisper002
Summary: All the things we lostIn the backseat of the skyGrowing up with eyes glued shutWishing on a star that's just a satelliteBucky wishes Steve was still with them, and Sam's there to hear him out.Title from Satellite - All Time Low
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Sam Wilson
Series: After The Storm [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1883713
Comments: 1
Kudos: 9





	Wishing on a Star, That's Just a Satellite

**Author's Note:**

> This one's a bit lighter than the last, I promise lmao

“I wish you were here.”

He always started every conversation off the same. Swallowing hard, he pushed the impending sob to the back of his mind. He’d given up a long time ago on waiting for an answer that would never come. 

Ignoring the crack in his voice, he continued on, tracing random patterns into the grass with a battered twig he’d found.

“I got a cat today. I named her Belle. Sam thought it was a stupid name, but it was better than what he suggested.”

Bucky turned his face up to the stars that twinkled softly against the gray-violet blanket of sky. He allowed the smallest bit of a smile to appear on his face, and gave a sad laugh. 

“I mean, who names a cat, _Kat._ ”

Bucky dropped his head again and sighed.

“I think he was just trying to make me laugh though. You know Sam, never a dull moment with him.”

The soldier leaned his head against the heavy stone that marked his friend’s grave. 

“It’s been four months, two weeks, and six days since you left, Steve, for good, I mean. Sam _also_ gives me shit for keeping track, but I don’t care. I’ve gotta know how much lost time I’m gonna need to make up for when I get to where you are again.”

He grew quiet after that. 

It was one thing to lose Steve to the past, lost in time once again. At least he’d come back to them, even if he was the old man Nat had always teased him for.

But eventually time was a traitor once more, and took the old captain for good this time, leaving Bucky alone. 

“Jesus, Steve, why’d you have to go and ditch me like that? What ever happened to “I’m with you till the end of the line”? What about _me_ ?” He glared at the silent headstone, “I told you not to do anything stupid, and then you went and _died._ ”

“Ya know,” A new voice from behind caused Bucky to start, “If he were here, I don’t think he’d appreciate being yelled at.”

Shaking off his initial surprise, Bucky recognized the voice straight away. 

“How’d you know I was here?”

He could hear the shrug in Sam’s response. 

“Where else would you be?”

The frosted grass crunched as the Neo-Captain America took the spot beside him. 

“Hey, asshole.” He greeted the marble marker inscribed with their best friend’s name, then he turned his attention to Bucky.

“You tell him about Kat?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “Her name’s, Belle, Sam.”

“Not in my head, it isn’t.”

The Winter Soldier sighed, glancing up at the night sky again. 

“Sometimes, when I miss him too much, I try to pick out which one he is.”

Sam nodded but didn’t speak, not wanting to interrupt Bucky’s coping mechanism.

“It makes him feel closer.”

“I think maybe his soul got implanted into a satellite instead.” Sam finally put in.

“Why?”

“Well, think about it. Stars stay in one place, but satellites move around, always checking up on everybody.”

“You’re weird.”

Sam snorted, “Gee, thanks”

But Bucky couldn’t bring himself to smile with him. 

“Steve used to say weird stuff all the time when we were kids.”

The laughter slipped from Sam’s eyes and his gaze fell somber again.

“Tell me about him.” He coaxed softly.

“Where to begin.” Bucky replied, “He was always kind of a dork. Steve was that kid in the back of the room that no one noticed, always stumbled over his own two feet. That’s how we met, actually. We were getting off the bus from school, and he crashed straight into me. I fell down the stairs and twisted my ankle. The bus driver didn’t care so much and just drove off, but Steve sat with me the whole time while someone else went for help.”

“That sounds like Steve.” Sam held back a laugh, “Dumb as a box of rocks sometimes, but always equipped with a good heart.”

“Hey,” Bucky shoved the younger man playfully, “That’s my best friend you’re talking about. Anyway, he followed me all the way home to make sure I was okay. He ended up staying over for dinner, and I taught him how to play checkers.”

“Let me guess,” Sam interrupted, “You two were inseparable after that.”

“Pretty much. My mom always said we grew up attached at the hip. It killed me when I lost him the first time. And then with everything that happened after, I…he never gave up on me, Sam. So, I don’t understand…”

Bucky didn’t have it in him to finish the sentence.

Sam rested a hand on his friend’s shoulder. He understood what Bucky was feeling. He’d gone through it himself after he lost Riley, and again with Steve.

“Sometimes, I have a hard time with it too. But I think in Steve’s mind, he didn’t feel like there was anything left for him here. Tony and Nat were gone. Peggy was gone. You were healed. Steve was so busy living for other people, you know? But when those people didn’t need him, there was no one to live for anymore. He had to start living for himself.”

“Then he was an idiot, because _I_ need him. Now _I_ have no one.”

“You have me, and I think that’s why he felt he could leave. Can you understand that?”

Bucky nodded, “Yeah. I just wish we hadn’t grown up with our eyes closed, you know? We were just kids, always thinking the world was infinite. I wish we had more time.”

“Well, we can wish on a million stars, but wishes won’t bring him back.”

“I know.”

The two friends fell silent, sitting together in their fallen comrade’s presence. 

“Hey, Sam?”

“Thanks for coming to get me.”

“Anytime, man. Anytime.”

  
  



End file.
